Give . . . and you shall receive.

If you light a lamp for somebody, it will also brighten your path.

Buddha

Sew the Seeds of a Conscious Experience.

Good relationships always start with the heart.  A mentor of mine said, “The most conscious person in a conversation is responsible for the outcome”,  it almost always means you.

Gift others the possibility of being their best self by setting up the mood, situation, experience and even outcomes by lighting their lamps.  If you are introducing someone, mention why you like them first. “Hey Greg, meet the women who is responsible for my wife and I meeting.  I owe this women my heart, meet my dear friend Shelley.”  “Hey Diane, meet the man who has taught me more about finance than the Wall Street Journal.  This is my great friend and mentor Phillip Stanley.”   Compare that to, “Greg, this is Shelley.” or “Diane, this is Phil.”

Yeah, you know you’ve done it.  What a lost opportunity for you, yes.  But think about how much it can mean for them.  I mean, could there be a larger return for a smaller effort than taking the time to think about someone else’s opportunity for success?

If you may think you have a chance to be a matchmaker, try something like this.  “Hey Robert, meet my wonderful friend, Suzanne.  She just graduated in Business from Stern at NYU, and she loves great music.  We should all take in a concert together soon.”  Good experiences through good communication is a gift that you can easily give to the experiences of others.  Use the opportunity to ensure the experiences of those around you are more than they would be without you.

In business settings, the same can be true.  “Please join me in welcoming to the stage the person who constantly goes above and beyond and delivers the best new candidates to our team, Deborah Henderson.”  “Roger, let me introduce Jane Humbolt. Jane led the team that captured the Cassidy account.  I’m happy to hear she will be working with you, she is one of the best in her field.”   Taking the time to think about how you can help others shine can not only make a huge difference to the upcoming experience of those you are around, but what do you think these people will think about you after introducing them in this manner and ensuring their success?

Personal relationships are taken for granted most of the time, yet these are the people that are closest to you.  Don’t they deserve the time to think about how you interact with them?  If your best friend, your family, or your partner doesn’t deserve your best, than who does?  Taking these people, these moments, for granted diminishes them and your relationship with them.  Honor your close friends, business associates, and family with care and thoughtful insight.  If you don’t care enough to make them feel good when they are around you, they might not be around you for long.

Good experiences and good communication are gifts that you can give to the experiences of others. You have a choice when you enter a conversation. You can create the very best experience for both of you or you can create the very worst situation for both of you.  I guarantee you it’s for both.  If you want a positive experience out of it for yourself, you must create it for the other person.  It helps a great deal to do that first.